Show Me Love
by astoryaboutagirl
Summary: AU. Both lost, but for different reasons, Cloud and Leon struggle through life. But after a chance meeting can they help each other learn to love again?
1. Random Acts of Mindlessness

**Show Me Love**

_**A/N:** I know that this story line has probably been done before, but I've been in kind of a slump and it just kind of popped into my head and I had to write it. _

_The rating is for later chapters. As always any and all feedback is appreciated, please let me know what you think and whether I should continue. Thanks xo._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, or any of the characters. Square Enix does._

Leon slammed the lid of his laptop shut, nothing was working tonight. Prying his glasses off his face he set them on top and rubbed his tried, grey eyes. He pushed himself away from the desk and reached out to grab the bottle of Cutty Sark and a glass from atop the cupboard. Pouring himself a large measure he downed it in one, before getting up, the bottle and glass still in his hands, and making his way into the lounge.

He sat in the darkness, the only light filtering in from the moon and stars, through the window of his lavish, top floor apartment. Closing his eyes the brunet sank into the plush, brown leather chair, head tilted back, absently rubbing the bridge of his nose.

He ran the last sentence through his head over and over, trying to get just a little further, but soon giving up. Instead, he opened his eyes and wearily glanced at the glowing numerals of the DVD player. A little after midnight. Leon slowly got up and slid on his fur trimmed leather jacket, then headed out the door, deciding that a walk might be just what he needed.

* * *

Across town, in a cluttered studio apartment, a young blond was sat staring blankly at the canvas before him. He turned his gaze to the brushes and tubes of paint before him, then turned away. He didn't see the point in trying to paint. He'd given up after everything began to turn out the same way. Everything looked unfinished somehow. There was just something missing from all of them.

Cloud sighed. He ran a hand through his already dishevelled hair and turned away. Deciding he just couldn't face things right now, he got to his feet and left his make shift studio. As he washed his hands he decided that he'd go for a drink, he just needed to get out of the apartment. Away from the suffocating smells of paint and turps and the knowledge that if he didn't paint something he could show, and someone would buy soon he wouldn't be able to eat. Cloud shrugged on a light jacket and grabbed the keys to his bike, in the mood for speed and danger.

The Seventh Heaven was a small, dimly lit but clean bar owned by his long time friend Tifa Lockheart. Hence, no sooner had he sat at the bar than she had slid his usual in front of him.

"A little late for you isn't it?" She asked with a friendly smile.

Indeed, the bar was nearly empty. Just the last few stragglers left, though Cloud knew that the bar would still remain open for another few hours yet.

"You're going to wear yourself out." She warned when he didn't answer.

"I can't help it Teef." Cloud sighed, "I just can't paint and when I do nothing turns out right." He muttered. _Nothing since he died_, he added silently to himself. "If I don't paint something soon..." he trailed off.

Tifa looked at him with sympathy in her eyes. Cloud hadn't been the same since Zack, his boyfriend, had died. A traffic accident, a car had collided with the motorbike he was riding. Cloud had practically locked himself away from the world for a good month or so. Eventually she had gone to see him, banging on the door until he let her in. The figure who had answered had been unrecognisable. The blond had been thin and gaunt, painfully apparent that he hadn't eaten properly in weeks. The apartment itself looked untouched since the funeral.

That had been almost two years ago now, but Cloud had never really recovered. Tifa wondered if he ever would as she refilled his glass. He'd been full of such promise, having graduated from one of the top art schools and won several prestigious awards. Yet, after Zack had died he seemed to have given up. Unable to paint, he'd shown a few paintings at small galleries, where people had owed him favours, but none of them sold. He'd stopped painting after that.

"Zack wouldn't have wanted you to morn him like this, Cloud." Tifa began gently, "He would have wanted you to go on with your life, live it to the fullest and chase your dreams." She gently laid her hand on his own, offering him what little comfort she could.

She moved away from him as another customer entered the bar and took a seat on the stool next to his. Cloud didn't bother to look at him at all, though he felt piercing eyes on him.

"What will it be?" Tifa asked, regarding the newcomer.

"Scotch, neat." The brunet answered, grey eyes appraising the bar. He wasn't sure what had attracted him to this place, but he had been walking past and not having noticed it before had decided to see what it was like. Besides he had been in need of a drink and it was getting rather cold outside.

Leon muttered his thanks as the bar tender set the glass in front of him and then proceeded to begin cleaning glasses, rather than talk to the blond sat beside him. Obviously he must have interrupted something private between the two. His mind turned the idea over and over for a few moments, before inspiration hit.

His fingers itched as he fished a small notebook from inside his pocket. He knew it was pointless because as soon as he sat before his laptop he knew he would once more be unable to write a thing. Everything that he put onto paper sounded so pathetic, it lacked passion and emotion. His characters were hollow and unbelievable. Still he had to try, he wouldn't give up. He wouldn't let himself.

He glanced up from fishing in his pockets, unable to find a pen, only to be greeted by the fact that the bartender had completely disappeared. He looked first to his left, then his right. The only person still at the bar, other than himself was the blond sat beside him.

"Excuse me, but you wouldn't happen to have a pen, would you?" Leon asked politely.

The stranger looked up from his own drinks and checked both his outer pockets, one of his inner pockets and then the other before coming up with a pencil. He turned and offered the rather gnarled looking, paint covered item to the other man.

Leon reached out to take it from the blond but found himself pausing, the man before him oddly captivating. His frame was lithe and he wasn't very well built, with just a hint of muscle beneath his jacket. His blond hair was dishevelled, shinning where the light caught it. Examining his face more closely, Leon noticed that there was delicateness to the other's features, making him look almost beautiful, angelic. Only the image lost its power when he noticed how lifeless his blue eyes were, the tired circles around them.

The blond waved the pencil at him, Leon hadn't realised he was starring till that moment. He accepted the object and turned away.

Cloud patiently waited for the brunet to finish with the pencil, his eyes never leaving the other man's slightly hunched form as he scribbled, still feeling a little on edge that the brunet had spent quite that amount of time starring at him.

* * *

Finally, after snapping his book closed and tucking it back into one of his inner jacket pockets, the stranger handed Cloud back his pencil.

"Thank you." The brunet, who now Cloud looked more closely had a scar running diagonally, from left to right, forehead to just below his eye, said.

Cloud simply nodded slightly and took the pencil back, tucking it into his pocket. Exchange over they both turned back to their drinks.

Eventually, closing time rolled around and Cloud hadn't touched his drink since they'd spoken.

"Here. Keep the change." Leon told Tifa, little hint of emotion in his voice, sliding more than the required amount of munny across the counter, along with his bill.

"Thanks." Tifa smiled.

Leon nodded and got up as Cloud began to count out the munny for his bill, but Tifa reached out to stop him.

"Don't worry, it's on the house." Tifa smiled kindly, "Cloud." She warned, when she saw the protest written on his face, before he could open his mouth.

"You're too good to me." Cloud sighed, knowing better than to argue with Tifa.

"I don't do it for just anyone." She laughed, brushing off his comment.

"Thanks Teef." Cloud replied, returning her smile, "Good night."

"Good night, Cloud. Take care of yourself and remember you're welcome here anytime."

Cloud held up his hand in way of a goodbye, before leaving.

His smile disappeared as he walked out into a new day, without sparing a thought for the man who had been sat next to him.

* * *

Chapter 1: Random acts of Mindlessness


	2. Everything Now in the Past

**Show Me Love**

_**AN:** Firstly, thank you to everyone who has reviewed, favourited or added my work to their alerts. I'm really touched by it and love receiving reviews (who doesn't)._

_I know it took a while for the second chapter. Sorry, I've been trying to write it for the last three weeks. It's been so difficult. I really hope it's not too borring, but I wanted to set up Leon's character, like I set up_

_Cloud's in the first chapter. Anyway I hope you enjoy it. As always let me know what you think. Any comments and criticisms are welcome._

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kingdom Hearts, or any of the characters. Square Enix does._

* * *

_Chp2. Everything Now in the Past..._

After The Seventh Heaven closed, instead of going straight home, Leon chose to spend some time wandering through the streets of Radiant Garden.

No matter how hard he tried to deny it, he couldn't believe how cold he had become. To look into the eyes of the man he had borrowed the pencil from, see those emotions swirling in their depths and feel nothing.

Though he didn't wish to be, he was forcibly reminded that he had once been nicknamed 'The Ice Prince,' back before he had met Rinoa and now afterwards it would seem he had let the icy wall, he had used to protect himself, grow back several layers thicker. He hadn't meant to become so cold, to the point he wasn't sure he could feel anymore but after being hurt so badly, he was scared to be hurt again, although he would never admit to that.

Leon forced his mind back to the more pressing issue of writing the last story for the collection he was working one. He had decided to publish something slightly different after a suggestion from his editor, Aerith, who was one of the only two people that he still trusted enough to allow them in his life. The other being his younger sister, Kairi, who he almost never heard from.

He wasn't sure what it was about Aerith, but she could somehow always get him to open up and talk. So, about a year ago when he had told her that he was having trouble writing anything she had suggested a collection of short stories and not to worry what genre they were and what they were about. It had worked, he had just one left to write, but no matter what he put on paper it just didn't seem to work.

He mulled over the ideas he had written down at the bar and getting, once again, no where looked at his watch. The sun was going to be coming up soon, hence he turned around and began the long walk back to his apartment, his head no clearer than it had been when he left his abode earlier that evening.

The brunet made it home just as the first vestiges of sun light began to chase away the darkness. He nodded to the doorman and headed for the elevator without a second thought as a sudden wave of exhaustion hit him. Leon just about managed to stumbled inside, get undressed and crawl into bed before he fell into a deep dreamless sleep.

* * *

The next time Leon awoke it was to the shrill ringing of his alarm clock. With a practiced obedience Leon reached, turned off the alarm and got out of bed. He then proceeded to walk into his study and turn on his laptop. The first thing he did every morning, but seeing as it was a Thursday instead of getting ready for his morning run he wandered into the kitchen and made himself a cup of coffee and some wheat toast.

He took a seat at the chrome breakfast bar, yawning as he picked up the paper from the day before. Leon knew that he should probably have let himself have a little more sleep, after all he had been staying up till all hours for the past few days trying to get something written and failing miserably. However, he liked the way his life ran like clockwork, he had a routine that he liked to keep to and he didn't want to disrupt it.

Sipping at his coffee and eating his toast, he skimmed through the paper, pausing when a familiar name caught his eye in the public announcements. Leon read the small notice three times before he let it sink in. It had to be some sort of mistake, but he knew as soon as he saw the picture that it wasn't. There was no doubt about it. Rinoa was getting married. To Seifer.

Leon closed the paper. He didn't know then and he didn't think he would ever know, or understand, what Rinoa saw in Seifer.

Even though it had been several years ago it still hurt Leon to know that Rinoa had left him for Seifer. The sight of walking in on them was one that would be permanently burned into his memory.

Leon threw away the end of his toast and coffee, suddenly he wasn't hungry anymore, and put the plate and cup in the sink, before getting ready for the day ahead.

The brunet author sat down at his laptop and grabbed his spectacles as he opened the document he had saved the day before. Mentally he shook his head, rubbing the bridge of his nose. There was nothing worth salvaging.

He sighed, after Rinoa had left him writing seemed to have become his entire life. He had wanted to prove that he didn't need her, or the support she had given him in order to be successful. The problem was that as he willingly let becoming an author consume his life the few friends he had had seemed to drift away. They had eventually become tired of only getting his answering machine and never being called back. Most of them had been mutual friends of both he and Rinoa and he suspected many of them had probably known about her and Seifer before he did. They'd probably had a good laugh, he thought bitterly.

Leon got up and went to get his notebook out his jacket pocket. Walking back through the living room as the maid let herself in. He nodded to her briefly and disappeared back into his study.

With the success of his first book he had been able to quit his job as a construction worker. A friend of his father's was in the construction industry and had hired him when he needed help with jobs. The work had been hard, but the pay had been alright. Now he probably had enough money to build his own house.

Leon glanced through his notes, he really did shake his head this time. He couldn't understand why the last story just wouldn't slip into place. He had all the pieces already, he just needed to gather them together. All the stories were connected together, but in such a way the more you read the more you could see the connections between each piece. As such the last one had to be the tale of the narrator. The problem was Leon didn't know who the narrator was.

The brunet got up and retrieved the file which contained all the transcripts of the stories that he'd written for the collection so far. The only thing he could do was read through them and hope he could come up with the answer. He reminded himself that he still had about a month before his deadline as he opened it and began to read.

* * *

After dinner, Leon decided to get an early night. He lay in bed, on his side, the lamp on with his file and a notepad beside him. He'd made a few notes, but so far hadn't made much progress.

He collected everything together and placed it on the small, beside table in case inspiration suddenly struck in the middle of the night. Then he switch of the light and closed his eyes.

Leon tried to drift off to sleep but all he could think about was the news he had found out today. He wondered, though he knew it would do little good, why Rinoa had cheated on him. Was it because he had been so cold? Had he not had enough money? Was he not good looking enough, compared to Seifer? Leon just didn't know and he knew he never would, but it was one of those annoying questions, the type you needed the answer to. Sure, he had moved on, but he wasn't sure he would ever have closure until he knew the answer to that question.

Leon forced himself not to think about that, he hadn't all day, but then he had had the distraction of needing to finish his latest work so that it would be published on time.

He opened his eyes, before turning over and closing them once more only to be greeted by those swirling pools of blue once more.

Though he didn't know why they haunted his thoughts, until he eventually fell asleep.


	3. Staring at Your Photograph

**Show Me Love**

_A/N: I really wanted to update earlier this week, but unfortunately the chapter took much longer to write than I expected and this week has been rather busy for me with one thing and another. _

_Anyway, I really hope you enjoy reading this and that you find it much more interesting than the last chapter. Enjoy and as always any feedback is much appreciated._

_Disclaimer: I do not own KH or any of the characters, Square Enix does._

_

* * *

_

_Chapter 3: Staring at Your Photograph_

For Cloud the last few weeks had been nothing short of a nightmare and it was only getting worse. The blond tugged uncomfortably at the collar of his white shirt as another group of art critic's approached. He knew exactly what was about to be said, before they even opened their mouths to speak. Their questions and his answers would be totally pointless, they would all draw the same conclusions as those that had examined his work previously.

Before the night had even begun Cloud had asked himself why he was even here, but the answer to that question was a pretty simple one. Naminé.

A few days after the blond had last visited the Seventh Heaven he had awoken to Tifa banging on his door. His sister, Naminé, had called Tifa and asked her if she had seen or heard from him when he hadn't returned her call. Evidently, or according to Tifa at least, her worry had been well founded when Tifa had been greeted by a rather thin and worn looking Cloud and an apartment in disarray, which had apparently not been cleaned in several weeks. After making him breakfast, Tifa had proceeded to restock his cupboards and fridge and clean the entire apartment from top to bottom, with his help of course.

It was only after she left that he had called Naminé, who had told him that she was holding a gallery showing of not only her own work, but other up and coming artists too, and that she would very much appreciate it if he would let an example of his work be put on display and perhaps attend the showing. And of course somehow, Cloud had found himself agreeing. Then Naminé had told him that he had about two weeks. He would have had longer had he actually returned her call when she had first called him.

Hence, that was why he was now stood in front of a large canvas, which he had entitled 'The Last Goodbye.' A piece of work that set so many emotions swirling around inside him that he couldn't really say whether he was actually happy with it. Not that it really mattered what he thought. All that mattered was what the critics thought and that was that the style was outdated and the painting was mediocre at best, and since the critics hated it, it wouldn't sell.

Cloud heaved a sigh as he watched them walk away and move on to the next piece, wondering how in Hyne's name he was going to pay the bills this month, let alone Tifa back.

"Cloud?"

"Hey." Cloud smiled shakily at his sister.

"I'm sorry. I never should—"

Cloud shook his head. "Its ok—" He stopped mid sentence though as he caught sight of a familiar looking male walking towards them, accompanied by a shorter brunette.

As if his night couldn't get much worse.

* * *

Leon was torn as he set foot in the large, glass fronted building that Naminé had rented as a makeshift gallery. He didn't know whether to be elated that a certain blond, who had been drifting into his thoughts more and more often in the last few weeks, was standing across the room, or to turn on his heel and walk out.

He wasn't even planning on being here tonight. The only reason he was present was because his younger sister had seen fit to coerce him into going with her. He wasn't sure how Kairi did it but she had somehow convinced him.

"When was the last time you went out? And not just to some bar alone?" She had asked.

He hadn't had an answer to that, but also what kind of brother would he have been had he not have gone with her tonight? Whilst the crime rate in Radiant Garden was somewhere close to zero, part of him still didn't feel that his sister would be safe out in the city after dark.

But now, having seen the blond, he wondered if he had made a mistake. It wasn't that Leon disliked the blond, for one thing he didn't know him. In fact if he was entirely honest with himself the man intrigued him, if the way his eyes had been drifting in and out of his thoughts recently were anything to go by. Only Leon would never admit that, even to himself. Just like the fact he would never admit he wanted to get to know the man he'd met that night at the bar, but he was too scared of letting someone else into his life. Scared that if he let him in he would only end up getting hurt again.

However, it seemed as though his mind was made up for him as he was forced to follow his sister, who was making a beeline straight for the blond and his companion.

"Naminé!" A young, pretty brunette exclaimed as she approached Naminé .

"Kairi?" She asked a little surprised, "What are you doing here?"

"Sora told me I should come, since I was in town."

"Oh. Well, how long are you here for, we should do lunch." Naminé smiled.

Cloud listened to the two girls chatting away, before tuning out as he noticed that the man he had met that night at the Seventh Heaven was staring at his work. Cloud looked away suddenly as he turned his piercing grey gaze his way and wandered over to the group.

"Oh, I'm sorry Cloud." Naminé apologised at a break in conversation. She turned back to Kairi and the man who seemed to be accompanying her, "Kairi, this is my brother, Cloud. Cloud this is my best friend, Kairi and..." Naminé left the question hanging.

"Nice to meet you." Kairi smiled, accepting the hand Cloud offered and shook it warmly. "This is my brother Squ—" Kairi suddenly stopped mid-sentence, pain quickly crossing her face before disappearing.

"Leon, Loire. Pleased to meet you." The brunet interrupted, taking a step forward, so he was between Kairi and her friend. He first shook Naminé's hand, then her brother's, Cloud.

"Nice to meet you too." Naminé smiled politely.

Cloud said nothing, forcing what he hoped wasn't too weaker smile. The brunet returned it in the form of a polite smile, then turned and walked back to re-examine Cloud's painting as the two girls began to chatter away again. Cloud watched him go, wondering if Leon was expecting him to follow.

He glanced over at the brunet who seemed to be almost transfixed, but he must have sensed Cloud looking at him as he turned to look at him. The moment their eyes met though, the blond artist felt like he was drowning and suffocating all at once. Politely, he excused himself, telling Naminé he was going for some fresh air.

* * *

Cloud stood outside on the second floor balcony, nursing a glass of champagne he had been offered by one of the waiters. He stood by the railings, watching the ground below. He saw but he wasn't really taking anything in. Instead, he was trying to sift through the swirling pit of emotions at war within him.

He was angry, of that he could be certain. Angry at Leon for making him feel like he thought only Zack had been able to and because he made Cloud scared, scared that he could love someone the way he had loved Zack with all his heart. He was angry at himself too, perhaps more so than he was at the brunet, because he was letting Leon make him feel that way.

He sipped at the champagne and grimaced.

"I thought I might find you here." Cloud turned at the sound of Leon's voice, finding the brunet standing just behind him. "Would you mind if I joined you?" He continued when the blond didn't answer.

"If you want." Cloud muttered as Leon took up position beside him.

"I wanted to ask you some questions about your painting."

Cloud turned to look at him, this was the last thing he needed, somebody else telling him how bad his work was.

"Go ahead." Cloud sighed.

"It really is a beautiful painting. Who's the person in it?"

Cloud's eyes went wide and his breath seemed to leave his body. "That's private." Cloud choked out, "Does it matter?" He asked a second later, unable to help but wonder why Leon was asking about it.

"No." Leon asked honestly, "It's beside the point. How much would it be to purchase it?"

"It's not for sale." Cloud answered a little too quickly. He knew he needed to sell the painting if he had any hope in eating for the next month or so, but he just couldn't, not to this person.

"I'll pay you double." Leon offered, but when Cloud's expression remained unchanged he pulled a pen and his note book out of his dinner jacket. Quickly he scribbled down a sum; tore the page out and folded it over, before handing it to the blond.

"Think about it." Leon told him. Then turned away and walked back indoors.

Once Leon had disappeared Cloud unfolded the paper and stared at the sum. It was more than double the price that he would sell the painting at. A lot more. He stuffed the paper into the pocket of his suit pants. However, it still wasn't for sale.

* * *

It was Naminé who found Cloud sometime later, standing in the same spot Leon had left him, starring at a photograph.

"Cloud?"

In response, the blond turned to look at his sister and placed the photograph back in his pocket.

"He wants to buy it, Nam." Cloud murmured, voice barely audible.

Naminé reached out and gently rested her hand on his arm, reassuring him.

"But that's a good thing, right?"

"It's Zack."

"I know, but you called it 'The Last Goodbye.' Zack would want you to move on."

Cloud sighed. He could understand what Naminé meant, but he just wasn't sure he could sell his painting.

Wordlessly he took the slip of paper Leon had given him and unfolding it handed it to Naminé.

"Is this his offer?" Naminé asked, her eyebrows arching slightly in surprise at such a price.

"Yes."

"Well, it certainly is...generous." Naminé replied eventually, choosing her words carefully.

"It is." Cloud agreed with a sigh, accepting the paper once more and staring at it as if the answer might suddenly appear.

"It's a decision that only you can make Cloud." Naminé replied, gently kissing him on the cheek, wishing she could help her brother but knowing what she said was true.

* * *

Leon stood before Cloud's painting, still admiring it. There was just something about the piece that had him transfixed, yet another reason he found the blond so intriguing.

The room had long since quietened, signalling that the night was coming to an end. Leon turned at the sound of footsteps. It was only then that he noticed, other than the few waiters collecting empty glasses, that he, Kairi and Naminé were the only ones left. Absently he wondered where Cloud had got to.

Naminé finished her conversation with Kairi as she approached. She turned to Leon,

"I really am very sorry," Naminé began, "Unfortunately, my brother..." Naminé turned at the sound of a quiet cough.

"Here," Cloud offered Leon a napkin, "I'm sorry, I had a lot to think about." He apologised somewhat awkwardly, not knowing how else to explain himself to someone he barely knew.

Sensing that this was a rather private matter, Naminé and Kairi wandered over to another part of the room.

Leon opened up the napkin and took in what was written there.

"Are you certain?" He asked, taking a step towards the blond. "It must be worth at least twice this, at least." The brunet insisted.

"It is only worth how much someone is willing to pay." Cloud replied.

"I'll buy it off you for double, this price hardly reflects the work that you put into it, I have no doubt. Will you take a cheque?" Leon asked, effectively ending all discussion.

Cloud could do nothing but nod. The look on the brunet's face was stern and didn't invite argument.

"Thank you." Cloud replied as he accepted the cheque.

"You're welcome. I'm just glad you changed your mind." Leon responded.

Cloud simply offered him the same forced smile as he had before, then using the napkin he took down Leon's phone number, explaining that he would have Naminé call him and make arrangements to have the painting delivered to him.

* * *

Later that night, when Cloud finally made it back to his apartment, he stood looking out his bedroom window, alternating between starring at Zack's picture and watching as late night traffic passed by. It had been the way he had always begun his day. Every morning he and Zack would watch the sunrise together, wrapped in each other's embrace, but now it just felt like a lonely vigil. In fact, that had been the subject of his painting. He had painted the rain falling outside this window, whilst Zack stood watching. His head pressed against the pane. In his reflection though, Zack had wings.

Part of him knew that he had done the correct thing in selling the painting, yet he still couldn't help but feel a little regret, if that was the right term, in selling it to Leon.

Cloud wandered over to his bedside table and picked up one of his sketch books. Taking a seat on the bed the blond opened it and slowly began to flick through it. He knew exactly what he would find. The majority of sketches were of Zack and various places they had visited, mixed with odd sketches of random objects that had inspired him. The change in the completion of the sketches however, was what Cloud was interested in. Towards the beginning they were all finished, but as he got further on they began to become less and less complete, until the last drawing.

The last drawing was one he had sketched the day after he had met the brunet at the Seventh Heaven and of course it was of Leon.

Cloud closed the book and put it back, before dropping his head into his hands. He didn't know what to do. What he could do.

Suddenly he felt exhausted. He would think about things properly in the morning, but climbing into bed he could think of nothing but the brunet and ended up tossing and turning angrily, before falling into a fitful sleep.


	4. Chances and Surprises, Part 1

**Show Me Love**

_A/N: I know it has been a long time, several months I think, so I am really sorry. I hope that people still want to read this._

_I've just gone into my second year at University and I have so much reading to do. One module is 6 books in twelve weeks, but I hope that I'll still get time to update. The first few weeks __have just been so hectic, as I'm on two committees for societies this year._

_Anyway, I just want to say Thank you to everyone who has favourited, or added this story to their subscription since the last chapter as it really has encouraged me to try and find time to put this up. Also a big thank you to Rosa Angelicus for listening to me moan about my lack of time and talk about my ideas, it means a hell of a lot._

_I hope you enjoy it. As always let me know what you think._

_Disclaimer: I don not own Kingdom Hearts, or any of the characters. Square Enix does. Also I do not own "Show Me Love" by t.A.T.u_

**

* * *

**

_Chp 4. Chances and Surprises, part 1_

"Would you mind if I sit with you?"

Leon looked up from the menu he was studying and met the blue eyes of one Cloud Strife. Swallowing his surprise he nodded.

"Not at all." This had been the last thing the brunet had expected, especially after the somewhat frosty reception he had received from the blond when they had unexpectedly bumped into each other earlier.

The brunet had been taking a leisurely walk up the falls, admiring them as he went, trying to find the inspiration he was so desperately seeking, when he had come across the blond at one of the observation points. Cloud had had a camera in his hand, snapping photographs despite the rain. Leon had made a wise decision not to approach the artist. Ever since the art show, Cloud had been on his mind and every time he looked at the painting he had bought, he was reminded of him. Yet, Leon still refused to admit to himself the strength of his feelings for the blond and besides this little vacation was not only meant to be a get away from the city.

Leon had stopped off at the next viewing point and had got so caught up in the amazing view that he hadn't even noticed when the object of his obsession had appear beside him.

"Leon?" Cloud had asked, seemingly unable to believe the other was there.

"Cloud. What are you doing here?"

"Just needed to get away from things." He replied quietly, as he snapped another photo. "See you around may be?" The blond asked with barely a hint of emotion, before disappearing without waiting for the answer.

* * *

Cloud knew he must be crazy, knew how this must look. Having thought about it though, albeit briefly, he'd decided that this was definitely the best decision. He reassured himself of this as he slid into the chair opposite the other man and picked up the menu.

He hardly knew Leon, but despite that he hated the brunet with a passion he'd never known before, yet he was somehow inexplicably drawn to the man before him. Hence, in the blond's mind the only way that he might be able to be rid of these feelings would be to get to know the brunet better. At least then he could say that he did hate the brunet and for good reason. Of course, Cloud knew full well he might honestly fall for the brunet after tonight was over, but the blond was certain that if he were to find he liked Leon he would only want to be friends with him. He would never betray Zack, as Cloud felt that if he were to ever find anyone else he would be betraying the only man he had and would ever love.

"Have you decided?" Leon asked softly, startling Cloud from his reverie.

The blond artist looked up from the menu he had yet to read and was greeted by the sight of a young waitress standing beside their table, pen poised.

"Would it be possible to have a few more minutes?" Cloud asked, not quite meeting her eye, before burying his head in the menu, as if it were the most riveting of novels.

"Of course." She replied softly and left them to it.

She returned a few minutes later to take their orders. Soup to start, followed by risotto for Leon, whilst Cloud ordered the pasta. The brunet also ordered a bottle of wine for them, after the briefest of discussions. As she left however, silence descended over the table, causing Cloud to realise just how quiet the restaurant was. The blond wracked his brain as he tried to come up with something, anything he could use to start a conversation, but it was Leon, in the end, who spoke first.

"Is this your first time visiting the falls?"

"Yes." Cloud answered.

"What do you think of them?" Leon asked, vaguely aware of the fact he was being much more open than usual. He hardly ever spoke with people, unless it was Aerith, who he'd known for longer than he cared to think about, or it was absolutely necessary. But with Cloud it was different, the brunet wanted to know what he thought. The thought briefly crossed his mind, before he pushed it away, that this was the very affect Rinoa had had on him.

"They are spectacular. Amazingly beautiful, yet so powerful." Cloud replied, looking away when he realised he had may have gotten a little carried away. In doing so though, he missed the smallest of smiles that Leon gave him. Although, in truth it was merely the slight up turning of his lips.

"Do you intend to draw the falls from the photographs you took today?" The brunet continued curiously, more than a little fascinated by the passion that seemed to consume the blond when he talked about the falls, which had so obviously inspired him.

"Maybe," Cloud confessed, "I was hoping that it wouldn't rain so I could sketch them first hand."

Leon nodded.

"What about you," Cloud asked as the wine arrived, "Have you ever visited the falls?"

"Yes, several times." Leon answered as he tasted the wine, before nodding that it would be acceptable.

Cloud waited silently, watching the brunet, wondering whether he would elaborate, but Leon didn't.

Cloud remained silent for a moment, before a thought struck him.

"I'm sorry, but I don't think you ever mentioned what job it was you did."

"You needn't apologise. It's only fair." The brunet replied, taking a sip of his wine, before continuing. "I'm an author."

Cloud nodded in response, taking a sip of his own wine as he tried to recall if he had ever heard of the author, Leon Loire.

"What type of books do you write? If you don't mind me asking." Cloud questioned, adverting his eyes, clearly embarrassed.

"I guess you would call them stories of important times in people's lives that shaped and changed them." Leon explained, giving the explanation he always used.

Cloud once again, nodded as he searched for something to continue the conversation with, but he was saved by the arrival of the dinner.

Their meal passed quietly. Quietly, and impossibly slowly. Their talk, which had fallen away since the food had arrived, had no prospect of being rekindled. The most either seemed to be capable of was a brief exchange of comments about the food they were eating.

Finally, the waitress cleared away their plates and brought them the dessert menu. After reading through the menu, Cloud looked up to find Leon still studying their choices.

"I'm not sure I can eat dessert." Cloud admitted quietly.

"You know, I'm not really much of a dessert person myself. Shall we just get the bill?"

"Please." Cloud nodded.

But when the bill came and Cloud reached for his wallet, Leon stopped him.

"Don't worry, I'll get this." Leon told him, gently.

"Thank you." Cloud found himself answering as he stilled his hands. There was just something about the brunet that made him unwilling to argue with him.

Once the bill was paid the two of them left, walking side by side, falling in to a comfortable silence. Cloud watched his feet on the unlit, uneven ground as they descended towards the first collection of cabins. He was suddenly feeling a little light headed and readily blamed the wine. It had always had this affect on him, he was just glad it had only been a few glasses and with dinner.

Leon stopped suddenly, pulling the blond out of his thoughts. Cloud stopped too and turned to look at the brunet standing beneath the lamp beside the narrow and winding path that led down into the village of cabins.

"Would you like to come in for coffee?" Leon asked. He didn't feel like being alone at this moment, a feeling foreign to the author, but more importantly he got the feeling that if he let Cloud go right now, tonight, he wouldn't see the blond again.

"Ok," Cloud found himself agreeing. It seemed that he wasn't in control of his mind and before he could think the offer through, he'd already decided.

Leon led the way, opening the door and holding it open for Cloud, before stepping inside himself.

"Is this cabin yours?" Cloud asked in awe of the sight before him. His back to Leon.

The cabin was of a relatively large size, open plan and made of pine. To Cloud's left was a plush, white three seater sofa; a matching love seat and an armchair all arranged around a low pine coffee table. There was an end table on either side of the three seater, on top of which sat two lamps. Cloud was quick to notice however, there was no TV insight. Although, he did notice that there was a newspaper lying on the coffee table.

"Yes," Leon replied, as he took off his jacket and hung it over the banister of the staircase that greeted you when you walked in.

Cloud turned to look at him and slipped off his own jacket seeing the brunet's outstretched hand.

"It's...impressive." The blond offered, trying to find the right words. The cabin he was borrowing from the Sinclair's- his younger brother, Roxas, was dating Axel- was nothing compared to this.

"Please, come in and make yourself at home," Leon offered, leading the way.

He waited until Cloud had taken a seat before disappearing towards the dining room, off to the left, and into the kitchen. The blond sat, admiring what little furnishings there were, until he laid his eyes on the bookcase that was set against the wall between the lounge area and the dining area. Though, he knew he shouldn't Cloud got up from where he was sitting and went to examine the bookshelf.

It quickly became apparent to Cloud that there were no books by Leon himself. He would have thought that a successful author, such as the brunet, would display copies of his own published works. His thoughts however, soon altered as he considered what he had done with his own paintings.

Cloud heard footsteps behind him and quickly turned to see Leon standing there, holding two mugs. The blond sheepishly took the mug he was offered,

"I'm sorry," he murmured, afraid that Leon might be annoyed at him for wandering about the cabin without permission.

Leon said nothing, though. Instead he turned and walked away back towards the sofa and sat down, leaving Cloud to follow him.

The blond took a seat in the chair beside Leon. Gingerly, he blew lightly on his coffee and took a sip. Usually, he didn't like coffee, but this tasted different, more delicious than any cup of the dark drink he'd ever drunk.

"How long are you staying here for?" Leon asked, as he sipped at his own drink.

"Just till the day after tomorrow. What about you?"

"Until I finish what I'm writing."

Cloud nodded.

"My editor suggested that I get out of the city." Leon elaborated. Not something that he usually did, but somehow Leon found himself opening up to the blond before him. Cloud just seemed to have that effect on him.

Cloud nodded again,

"It really is relaxing up here and I can see how it would be very easy to find inspiration." Cloud offered. He had a feeling that it might be the wine that was causing him to be more open than he usually would be.

"Do you not find the falls inspiring?" Leon asked somewhat confused by their earlier conversation.

Cloud could do nothing but look away hearing that statement. Since Zack had died Cloud hadn't been truly inspired. He'd barely painted and when he had it had always been of Zack.

He felt tears threaten when he thought of his last work, 'The Last Goodbye' and the fact he had actually sold it to the man before him. He had made a silent promise to himself that he would never sell any piece of work, since Zack's death, which involved his dark haired lover.

"Cloud?"

Cloud looked up, only to be greeted by the swirling grey of Leon's eyes. The brunet was so close to him. His hand resting gently on his arm. Though, Leon would never know it, he was forcing Cloud to correct himself. Since Zack had died he hadn't been truly inspired, until he met Leon.

"Cloud?" Leon asked again, as the blond continued to stare at him with a vacant expression.

When he got no response Leon got slowly to his feet and leaned in slightly, Cloud so lost in his own thoughts that he failed to notice.

"Cloud?" Leon tried gently, one last time.

This time Cloud blinked and found that Leon was hovering over him.

"Are you alright?" Leon asked, his voice like velvet, soft and warm.

Cloud was unable to answer, though. All he could do was stare up into the eyes of a man he hated. A man he hated for all the wrong reasons, except, right now, when all he could see was Leon, he couldn't seem to remember any of them. The hatred just seemed to fall away.

Instead it was replaced by a swirling sea of emotions that he thought he would never feel again. The blond's gaze fell to Leon's lips, yet he still didn't recognise his own subconscious wish, even as he moved closer. But as their lips did meet the hate he had felt, suddenly came surging back. Cloud pulled away, simultaneously pushing Leon away from him, before rising to his feet.

The artist walked away, leaving the stunned brunet to watch him go, but Leon would be damned if he let Cloud walk out of his life like this, not when there was still some hope, or at least so he thought, for the two of them.

"Cloud?" Leon asked as the blond reached the door.

Cloud however, didn't even hesitate as he reached for the handle, ready to walk away from Leon for good.

"Cloud?"

But this time his name was accompanied by a firm hand on his arm, forcing Cloud to turn and face the brunet.

"I hate you." Cloud spoke lowly, malice dripping from his voice, "I hate that you make me feel the way he made me feel." He continued, getting angrier with each passing second.

Seeing the blond so angry and hearing the maliciousness of his tone hurt Leon more than he thought was possible. He dropped his hand from Cloud's arm, letting it hang lifelessly at his side.

"I hate the fact I could love someone as much as I loved him." Cloud continued, voice rising with each confession, "And I hate that you make me forget Zack!" Cloud practically yelled before wrenching open the door and disappearing out into the night, whilst all Leon could do was watch the other's receding figure.

* * *

Cloud sat on the sofa, in the dark, dried tears staining his face. All about him lay scattered the remains of pages from his sketch book, all originally drawings of the same person. _Leon_. Cloud felt anger well up merely at the thought of his name and suddenly he wanted to be as far away as possible from the man in question.

His mind made up, Cloud got to his feet and disappeared into the bedroom he was using. He grabbed his bag full of art supplies and gathered up his belongings, stuffing them into his other bag as he made his way around the cabin, relying purely on the glow from the street lamps outside. He left the cabin, making sure to lock the door and pocket the keys, before loading up his bike. Then he mounted Fenrir and drove off into the night.


	5. Chances and Surprises, Part 2

**Show Me Love Chapter 5-**

**Chances and Surprises part 2 **

**_A/N:__ I have a really, really big apology to make to anyone who has been reading "Show Me Love," especially those who have left me reviews or added it to their watch. I am truly sorry, I __know I have been promising to update for months (I dread to think how long it has been) but unfortunately last year at uni was an absolute killer as in my last term I had to take 5 modules, instead of 4 and read six books in twelve weeks, as well as being on two committees for societies. Adding to that my muse decided to go on an extended vacation, which they have only just returned from. I can only try and promise you won't have to wait as long for the next chapter, if anyone is still reading this. If you do, please let me know what you think as feedback is always greatly appreciated. Thanks. _**

**_~Story xo_**

_Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, or any of the characters. Square Enix does. Also I do not own "Show Me Love" By t.A.T.u_

* * *

Leon pinched the bridge of his nose and looking down at the remnants of the freshly washed plate that had just slipped from his grip as he had been going to place it on the drainer. It was unlike him to be so clumsy, yet today he had nearly tripped over his own feet and almost bumped into another vacationer as he had been walking back to his cabin, fresh from his morning run.

Leon sighed as he stooped down and began to pick up the larger pieces of broken, white porcelain. No matter what he tried he couldn't seem to rid his mind of the night before. He just couldn't seem to distract himself as Cloud's admission replayed again and again.

Usually at a time like this, when something was weighing so heavily on his mind he would turn to his writing and burry himself in his characters lives and trials. He'd already tried that today, but with no avail. Everything he wrote either seemed too hopeful, or so hopeless that it bordered on clichéd.

Leon pinched the bridge of his nose again as he threw the last piece of broken china into the trash. Turning back to the washing up, he continued knowing that he'd have to get the vacuum out once he was done. He supposed that whilst he was at it he could clean the entire cabin considering the length of his absence.

The author knew that in truth this was only his attempt at a distraction from the previous night's events. To a certain extent it seemed to be working however, Leon couldn't help but wonder who the Zack that Cloud had mentioned was. Leon was pretty sure that he must be the blond's ex, but then if he felt as strongly as he seemed to about him then why wasn't Cloud with him?

As the brunet dried his hands on a towel having finished the washing up, he supposed that he should also stop obsessing over the best way to apologise to the blond. The problem however, appeared there was no concrete way to carry out such an act as they all relied upon the artist choosing to hear him out or not and Leon was more than willing to bet that 'or not' was the more likely of the two.

Exiting the kitchen Leon sighed to himself again. He could probably use some advice right about now but the only people he could talk to were either Kairi or Aerith. He'd immediately ruled out the former on the simple basis that she was his sister and eventually after much toing and throwing had decided that he couldn't talk to Aerith either.

It wasn't that he thought Aerith would disapprove, in fact he was sure she would whole heartedly support him. It was just, Leon had noticed, that she had been rather reluctant to talk about Cloud's painting when she had spotted it during one of her routine visits to his apartment and if she didn't want to talk about it Leon wasn't about to push her. Also, though he knew Aerith was his friend, she was still his editor and there was a professional boundary between them meaning Leon wasn't sure it was correct to talk to her about his love life with her.

Leon shook his head. Why he was still contemplating himself having a chance with the blond after last night was beyond him. Flopping down on the sofa, Leon put his head in his hands.

* * *

Cloud pushed the remains of his half eaten burger and fries around his plate. Usually, he wouldn't eat at a place like this but Roxas had dragged him there. Cloud had wanted to simply drop the keys to the Sinclair's cabin back and then make a quick exit, may be stay for a cup of tea at a push. However , that soon went out the window, as as soon as Roxas had seen him he knew something was wrong and had insisted on dragging him out for something to eat.

Needless to say over the course of the lunch Roxas had managed to get the story out of him. Not that he had taken much persuading and out of everyone he could think of Cloud would admit, albeit reluctantly, that he would rather talk to the elder of his twin brothers.

"So, let me get this straight. This guy—"

"Leon." Cloud interrupted.

"Leon," Roxas repeated, "kissed you and as a consequence you left, but not before you told him that you hated him."

"Pretty much." Cloud confirmed, dejectedly, suddenly losing the end of his appetite completely. He pushed the plate away from him and looked back up at Roxas.

"You don't really hate him, do you?"

Cloud was silent for a moment, surprised that Roxas was being so gentle with him. Out of all his siblings he was usually the one who never pulled punches. He was blunt and to the point. Cloud wondered whether this sudden change meant Roxas had really grown up since the last time he had met with him. That aside though, Cloud didn't actually know how to answer the question. He wasn't really sure how he felt about Leon and he hadn't actually said he hated him, just that he hated things about him. Cloud sighed, he might as well have.

"You wouldn't be this worked up about what happened if you did." Roxas pointed out, taking the other blond's silence as his answer.

"I just want to apologise. No one deserves to be treated that way." Cloud replied, as he looked away trying to subtly change the subject slightly, "At least if I go and speak to him in person," the blond continued, "there's a better chance he'll hear me out."

"Cloud," Roxas began gently, trying to steer them back on track, "I know that you loved Zack but it's ok for you to move on." Here he paused, thinking that he wanted nothing more than to see his brother happy. Something he was sure Zack would want too, but he chose not to add that. Instead continuing, "You don't have to admit to your feelings now, but you'll have to face them eventually."

Cloud turned back to look at Roxas, but remained silent for a moment, "I just don't know, Roxas. Even _if_ I do like Leon, I'm not sure I'll ever be ready to admit to it."

"I know that you're scared of forgetting Zack, but you loving someone else doesn't mean that will happen. Zack will always live on in your memories."

"I know." Cloud sighed once more. The whole conversation was beginning to give him a headache. "Could we may be talk about something else?"

"Sure." Roxas replied, deciding it might be better to change topic and let Cloud digest what he had said. He could understand Cloud's stubbornness and he was pretty sure that there was only one person who could persuade him to give Leon a chance. Unfortunately, it wasn't him.

"Other than the whole incident with Leon, what did you think of the falls?"

* * *

The two continued to talk for the next hour or so about Cloud's short vacation and the inspiration he had found there, before moving on to discuss Roxas' intentions to move in with his long term boyfriend, Axel, in the next few weeks. The move meant that Roxas would be closer to Cloud, but at the same time the blond didn't really care for Axel all that much. He supposed that didn't matter though, so long as he made his brother happy.

"You could always love Leon just as much as you loved Zack, you know." Roxas offered as they parted ways, Cloud having walked him home.

Cloud said nothing, but his expression betrayed him.

"Cloud, people don't get second chances at love very often." Roxas continued, trying to be a little more forceful this time, "Whatever you decide to do don't waste yours."

Cloud was stunned into silence, unable to speak even if he had had anything to say. Instead, all he could do was watch Roxas walk inside and shut the door before turning away and heading home himself. He had decided not to take Fenrir, opting to walk instead as he had reasoned with himself the fresh air would be good for him considering he'd spent the last few days locked in his studio.

It also gave him plenty of time to think. Talking to Roxas had helped, although he still wasn't sure if he would ever be able to love anyone, let alone Leon, after Zack. To Cloud Zack had been _the _one. No one, in his mind, should be able to replace him and the fact that Leon could make him feel the same way as his raven haired lover had terrified him.

Still, what Roxas had said about second chances stuck in his head as he continued home on auto-pilot. As a consequence, or so he would later claim, almost subconsciously, before he could realise what he was doing, he was calling Naminé to ask for Leon's address.

* * *

Leon sat starring at his laptop screen, nothing had changed from two weeks ago. He was back in the city and he still couldn't write a thing, in fact he was pretty sure his writers block was worse than ever. His vacation was meant to help him finish his work, not make it harder and he had only come back when he could no longer stand the cabin. He glanced at the clock, in the bottom right hand corner of the screen. It had just slipped past eleven p.m. He shut his laptop down and heaved himself up from the chair, deciding he should just call it a night and go to bed. He would try again tomorrow.

The brunet picked up his cold mug of coffee and went to dump it in the kitchen sink, taking a moment to notice how pristine his apartment was. No matter what happened in his life he seemed to go on living almost automatically, still keeping the apartment clean despite having a maid come in regularly. He turned away and walked briskly back into his bedroom.

Once in there Leon changed out of his clothes, neatly folding his jeans and placing them over a chair, whilst his t-shirt ended up in the laundry hamper, and into the folded sweatpants that rested on the end of his bed.

After brushing his teeth in the enjoining bathroom he got into bed, turned off the light and closed his eyes. Just as he was drifting off however, he heard a loud knocking at the door. Leon groaned as he turned over. What could anyone possibly want from him at this time of night? Hopefully, if he just ignored it whoever it was would give up and come back at a more reasonable hour if they really wanted to talk to him.

Unfortunately for Leon however, whoever it was knocked again, more insistently this time and then a third time. Leon sighed and sat up, his curiosity getting the better of him. The author switched on the lamp beside him and got out of bed, grabbing the t-shirt he had worn that day from the hamper and pulling it on as he walked to the front door, turning on a table lamp as he went. The brunet opened the door as he ran a hand through his hair to try and tame it a little, knowing it was no doubt in a less than kempt state.

If the person on the other side hadn't got a good reason for disturbing him he resolved they were not about to walk away unscathed. However, all thoughts of violence and even coherent speech went out the window as soon as he saw who was standing on his doorstep.

"Cloud?" A startled Leon finally managed to choke out.


End file.
